i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
my penis made a compromise with my morals
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
