I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
