dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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