But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Randomize
