Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
