Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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