RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
