dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
