I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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