For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Just invented taco cereal.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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