Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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