I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
We need to get me chipped asap
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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