I think I just saw someone hide a body.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize