theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize