when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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