but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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