dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I think I won the penis lottery.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
