i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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