she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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