Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
