you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
