thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
