I'm eating all of the evidence.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
