I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
