Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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