hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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