Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
