end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
