So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
