my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
It's never too late to be topless.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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