So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
