You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
