Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
