i barfeds in our rink
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize