can we get nightvision for the apartment?
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I forget how to act sober
Randomize