is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
