all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
