Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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