Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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