we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
