He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
we're making bets on your personal life
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
