and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize