my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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