Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Randomize
