I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
