Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize