i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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