i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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