is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
