You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
